PSALM 51

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment. Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. (Psalm 51:1-5)

I have been so thankful for this Psalm. Basically, it's allowed me to take 'Repentant Scott' and compare it to 'Repentant David under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit'. I have been challenged and humbled by seeing the differences. Two stand out:

1. I have trouble keeping my sin "ever before me".
2. I have trouble realizing that in a very real way, the most real way in fact, my sin is against God and God alone.

Calvin's commentary on this Psalm has given me advice on both these fronts.

1. HOW DO I KEEP MY SIN "EVER BEFORE ME"?

"The more easily satisfied we are under our sins, the more do we provoke God to punish them with severity, and if we really desire absolution from his hand, we must do more than confess our guilt in words; we must institute a rigid and formidable scrutiny into the character of our transgressions."

From this passage of Scripture (and Calvin's commentary) and conversation this week with some dear brothers, I've realized that the best first step for me in learning true repentance is studying my sin, or as Calvin says, "instituting a rigid and formidable scrutiny into its character". I have to anticipate the excuses which I in my flesh will no doubt employ to get myself off the hook and I must leave no room for these lies. I am guilty of sin and my sin is heinous with heinous consequences, for those whom I've sinned against directly, my local church family, and myself.

2. HOW DO I BELIEVE IN MY HEART THAT MY SIN IS TRULY AGAINST GOD?

"But I conceive his meaning to be, that though all the world should pardon him, he felt that God was the Judge with whom he had to do, that conscience hailed him to his bar, and that the voice of man could administer no relief to him, however much he might be disposed to forgive, or to excuse, or to flatter...To one who is thus overwhelmed with a sense of the dreadfulness of being obnoxious to the sentence of God, there needs no other accuser."

Scripture certainly acknowledges that as Christians, we sin against our brothers and sisters. And the Bible gives us clear direction and command to reconcile those relationships with repentance and forgiveness, but Calvin's point (which I think is also Scripture's point) is that God is our ultimate judge--and when compared to human judgment, the latter seems arbitrary. Two sinful tendencies get in the way of me believing this: My fear of man and my lack of fear of God.

The good news is that the rest of this Psalm goes on to anticipate the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on behalf of sinners--the Just for the unjust. And because I have placed faith in Jesus' person and work, I am seen as innocent in my Father's eyes. And not only that, but God by his Holy Spirit is actually making me into what He has declared me to be in Christ. The New Testament makes clear that this is motivation for acknowledging and battling sin--recognizing who I am in Christ.